Pathetic-ness

How pathetic am I?

I don’t what will happen if he will know this. Well I hope he won’t ever. Don’t want to confuse him or give him doubt of how I feel. It’s just that it happens, with no intention or what so ever.

After all these years, it’s kind of all coming back to me. I just saw him for this one brief moment. Just one brief moment and woosh! It’s like I’m back in my teens and drooling over him again. Am I not over him yet? This made me wonder because I felt a little quiver when I saw him but it’s no wonder because I considered him my first love. And that(!) almost made me believe that first love never dies. I even don’t want to admit it to myself, but he’s indeed, my first love.

Now to answer my pathetic-ness, I am indeed. Because after all this time, after all the things that happened, after everything, I should have NEVER felt that quiver, not even a little tingle. NEVER!

How pathetic!